Dad Files 5 Month Insights: Daycare, Carseats, Overnight Solo Parenting

Handing over your most precious person in the whole world for the first time to essentially a stranger at daycare and hoping they take care of him is challenging emotionally. Over time, you and baby will get to know the daycare workers and develop a relationship with them as they partner with you in his development. 

While you'd love for baby to never get sick, entering the halls of this institute of care is also germ central and will almost definitely result in a cough and cold within a few days of starting. There's nothing quite like seeing a booger encrusted classmate crawl towards your baby and reach out a slobber and snot filled hand to welcome him to the cold crew. Baby will subsequently have essentially a continuous cold and cough for the next few months. 

Listening to your baby coughing and sneezing while you can't do anything about it is hard. Boogie Wipes will become your new friend in the next weeks and months. You too may share in the new colds passed along from baby as he coughs or sneezes in your face. On the bright side, baby should have a rock solid immune system by the time he starts kindergarten.

As you take on the responsibility of drop off and pick up from daycare, time should be allotted to get baby dressed, bottles prepped and labeled, extra clothing changes, and a well stocked diaper bag plus some extra margin as baby requires. Don't be late for pick up; they're strict about that cutoff time and charge by the minute if you're late. 

If you're heading to the office following drop off, you'll want to be especially careful to dodge any spit up that may occur between home and hand off and it wouldn't hurt to keep a change of clothes in the car just in case. This can easily occur on the pick up side as well especially if they've fed baby immediately prior to pick up. Also possible is a blow out that you realize when you first smell then feel the sticky wetness on your own clothing as the transmission from baby to you occurs while walking to the car.

Sometimes you may split drop off and pickup responsibilities with your spouse. If you only have one car seat, you'll want to coordinate in advance to not get caught without the seat. It's a surprise if your wife leaves before you with the car seat but you are dropping baby off at daycare. Hope that you can get some work done at home because you're not going anywhere till she returns to trade off the car seat. Alternatively, if you leave with car seat but not baby and she is in charge of baby, you may get a call shortly into the work day resulting in a return home to trade off car seat. 

The first multi night solo parenting experience will make you appreciate single parents and the challenges they go through even more with the weight of all responsibilities and care taking falling fully on you. You will be very thankful when your wife returns home.

Baby will increasingly smile, laugh, babble, and explore introductory motions towards crawling as he gets stronger with lots of tummy time sessions. You can have fun baby sound conversations with him even if neither of you use a distinguishable language. Laughing with him is also a joyful experience for all involved. 

He will begin watching you from across the room and pay close attention to things of interest like the milk bottle or favorite toys. You may attempt feeding baby rice cereal or other foods like sweet potatoes. It's an experience as baby learns about spoons and how to get food down the hatch rather than spiting it out on clothing and generally all over his face.

In pursuit of His best,

Andrew

Dad Files: 2 Month Insights: Blowouts, Booger Picking, and Growing Strength

Baby will exhibit increasing strength. If you are doing skin to skin and have hair on your chest, you may consider shaving it or baby will rip it out by the fistful. With increasing strength, baby will also frequently break out of swaddles making you wonder whether he will pursue a career in escape artistry or strongman competitions in the future. This will heighten vigilance in proper swaddle technique particularly when desiring sleep. Baby’s head will remind you of a bobble head as he builds neck strength. Recoil in conjunction with burps may surprise you with increasing power.

When you arrive home from work, your spouse will hand him off after a day of fussiness so she can have a break. It may seem that all the baby is interested in when you get home is screaming at you especially if you’ve had a hard and stressful day at work. You will do anything possible to get him to go to sleep including beatboxing while assisting him with interpretive dance, bicep curls and triceps extensions with baby, tummy time, bouncing on knee, singing lullabies, whistling classical music, yelling back at baby (not effective), praying for relief, holding baby tightly, rocking baby, rubbing baby’s back, walking lap after lap around the house with baby, feeding, burping, changing diaper, changing diaper again, taking baby on walks outside, and anything else your sleep deprived mind comes up with.

You may sing popular songs on the radio to baby, worship songs, or even revert to your own childhood nursery singalongs. What comes out in your most desperate sleep deprived times digs deep to the core of your being.

If you keep baby with you during a church service, he may make joyful noises unto the Lord at inappropriate times. This will give you the opportunity to better acquaint yourself with the halls and parking lot of the church with baby while your spouse completes the service independently.

Doctors and nurses will poke, prod, and stick baby at checkups. You will need to take on faith that it is for baby’s long term good because short term will likely increase fussiness and screaming sessions.

A constipated baby will make you miss all those number 2 diaper changes. You will pray fervently for the bowels to resume normal function and with every passing of gas compulsively check diaper for poop. Once a juicy one finally comes to fruition, you will rejoice with songs of praise and thanksgiving.

On the other side of the spectrum, you will sometimes wonder if there is an immediate path from mouth to diaper and whether skipping the baby and pouring milk directly on the diaper would be more efficient.

The first public bathroom diaper change is an adventure. By this time you should be fairly experienced in diaper changes but the road game aspect adds a whole other dimension. If there are others in the bathroom, it can almost take on a public performance element. For my first one at Olive Garden, it was a major blowout with runny brown poo pudding covering all of baby’s lower half and exceeded the bounds of the diaper traveling half way up his back calling into question the wisdom of putting the onesie back on. He did well for most of the process with only three other patrons passing through until at the end the whaaaaaa alarm started going off and I was frantically rushing to avoid full on nuclear meltdown echoing through the bathroom chamber. I took baby back to the table with just a diaper on and with a harried look in my eye handed him off to my wife and went to get a new change of clothing from the car. Incidentally, my personal opinion is that just a diaper is a viable wardrobe choice.

Blowouts while traveling in the car will most likely be discovered as you are arriving for an event making an on time arrival shift to tardiness and a very messy cleanup in the backseat of the car. Probably in the range of a 12 wipe cleanup. You should always have a backup change of clothes for both baby and you. Woe to you if you don't take precautions.

You may never have picked someone else’s nose before. This likely will change. While snot sucking instruments can be helpful for the juicy ones, boogers on the dry side may need manual encouragement.

Keeping baby on a schedule and regular routines will benefit everyone involved. The feeding schedule in particular is similar to feeding a parking meter. You may skate by beyond the meter’s expiration but at the risk of a full throated rebuke from the pediatric parking attendant.

In pursuit of His best,

Andrew

Dad Files: 1 Month Insights: Sleep Deprivation, Diaper Changes, and Goat Sounds

Baby can quickly go from calm or sleeping to DEFCON level screaming at the top of his lungs. This is common if not meeting previously negotiated feeding times with baby. He will make your ears pay dearly for tardiness.

Babies and goats can make similar sounds which may be why they’re both called kids.

You will frequently feel an insatiable desire to sleep. If friends, family, neighbors, or work colleagues are not interesting and to the point, you get a free pass for a few winks of sleep. Really it’s on them and will encourage more efficient communication.

You can get decent strength training done by lifting, holding and playing with baby who should be steadily growing and adding to weight resistance.

You will willingly allow another human to fart on you. Volume and length of flatulence is disproportionate to the size of baby. You will learn to distinguish between a dry one and a juicy one the later which requires a subsequent diaper change.

When completing diaper change and holding legs in the air to clean the backside, beware of the crack which can expel either more of what you just cleansed concurrent with diaper change or fart directly in your face. Bending down close to the danger zone is ill advised and done at your own peril.

When in public, you should always have multiple diapers on hand as well as additional clothing for both baby and you. Blowout risk is real.

Showering with the baby is an efficient way of bathing him. Having one parent hold and one bathe is helpful. When cleaning the front side, beware the water cannon which may go off at any time unannounced.

Grandparents, other family, or friends can provide a nice respite if you need a nap, eat a meal with hands unencumbered, exercise, shower, or to run an errand. Friends or family who offer to do house work or bring a meal are greatly appreciated and get extra bonus points.

Your wife will do some very selfless things. 

A happy, fed, rested baby with a fresh diaper can be sweet and a lot of fun.

In pursuit of His best,

Andrew 

Dad Files: Insights After Two Weeks: Bodily Fluids, Feeding, and New Skills

Bodily fluids flow freely at all hours of the day. If you change a diaper and feel a sense of accomplishment, you likely will have the opportunity to repeat that accomplishment shortly, like inside of five minutes. Boys come installed with a water cannon, when changing his diaper note well and plan accordingly, it may very well find occasion to spray you, baby, swaddles, formerly clean clothing, walls, and anything else within a close radius.

If baby is smiling, it’s probably because he’s passing gas or otherwise refilling his diaper.

Tiny humans are capable of producing loud noises for long periods of time. Be the adult and don’t respond in kind.

Sleep deprivation can be brutal and it’s a good thing God gives kids two parents to tag team and share responsibilities. Prayer will help get you through the tough spots.

When feeding baby, don’t race to complete a bottle but pause at appropriate intervals. Your over confidence at having finished so quickly will bite you in the form of wearing half the bottle when baby spits it back up.

Burping is an essential part of feeding.

It’s possible to be peed on, pooped on, and puked on within a short time frame. Don’t assume the outfit you and baby plan to leave the house in are the ones you will actually be wearing. The amount of household laundry needs will rise exponentially.

Babies have sharp fingernails. 

The precious baby pictures that people post only tell half the story, baby will be grumpy and rage demandingly when hungry, tired, needing new diaper, while changing, putting in car seat, or for no apparent reason at all.

There are lots of skills to learn that you never knew you’d need to know. Bottle prep and feeding, diapering, swaddling, putting on and taking off tiny outfits with superfluous snaps and zippers, securing baby in car seat, skin to skin contact as a calming technique, singing lullabies, making silly sounds, and rocking baby to sleep.

When baby is calm, content, or sleeping, snuggles can be a lot of fun.

Meal trains are a great idea. 

Other parents are genuinely happy for you and remember the joys and challenges of raising their own kids.

Babies are a blessing and a gift from God. He gives wisdom for the journey.

 In pursuit of His best,

Andrew